Post by moments on Mar 18, 2005 14:42:41 GMT -5
So I'm not here much anymore, don't post because I don't have time/energy/ambition/strength-in-fingers. I thought I'd write here for a bit, to divulge my burning secrets, in lieu of actually conversing with a real human life. Well, I converse with people almost every day, but it's not always truth. So this here little electronic "page" will be used for some truths. Read on if you know me and have an inkling of intrigue.
life's been weird. i stopped working in the middle of januaury because i just can't. can't get up and walk into the arms of the republican goliath. these wheels on these machines, they squeal. like the pigs they represent. so? "i quit," in a voice so small a mouse struggled to hear. i dislike anything that i don't like. in other words: i will not be pushed around right? so im jobless, and march 18th still jobless. loving it so much in so many ways but its painful too.
i get up in the morning, an hour or two before the sun falls under the moon's blankets. i play guitar until my heart sings. i sing until my eyes tear. or some days my throat just won't let me sing two songs without falling to pieces... it causes vomiting other days. dry heaving at least. i eat food. i like showers. i smoke green things, and brown things, but never white things. day to day right?
i met a girl. i had a crush on her in first grade. but she disappeared for like.... 17 years? approximated. Kali. I, during my entire life, remembere this girl's name and had a vague and unrelated memory of her face/smile/eyes. So... i walk into a store around the block for some smokes. "nice shirt. im going to a party in brooklyn tonight, and fife-dog is spinning records." so she was being friendly. i like my shirt too, it was nice that she noticed. AND she likes tribe. so like.. a while later.. im getting smokes again. she offers me a donut.
i wanted chocolate but i took jelly... for her sake.
by the end of january, she offered me her number. we remembered a bit about the first grade. we talked over beers and a joint. she has an allergy to marijuana resin. she has a reaction when she gets it on her hands and then rubs her eyes or mouth or something. pretty fucked up i guess.
ive been getting out more. started to play some local open mic nights. singing for a cover band.. but i think im done with that now. broke the car i was driving so now i walk again. early spring walkin talkin man. i wrote a song a while ago with the line "i'll bring elvis home for christmas but the jumpsuit stays with me." i don't understand what that meant. more gifts from the dead i suppose.
Shareem is falling for a guy who happens to be in jail. again. the world always moves in the same directions i guess. we don't talk anymore. but ive been trying to contact her, to get her blessing. im going to fall in love with a girl, and i need reassurance that Shareem is alright with this all.
Hunter Thompson shot himself a while ago, and i thought that was pretty cool. he made it to 67 years and deserved to take a nap. we'll see him again i think.
Spring is here again.... reproductive glands....
i can't wait to move on. i think i am definitely a type of highly evolved parasite. oh the guilt! hahaha, whatever.... so im thinking about the middle part of this country. maybe i will go there and wait for a sign. a dirt road would do me justice now. i can't stand these new yawk high tawk accents. and the closet-queers who just wont admit the truth. fuck em. i wanna get myself down to texas and start a war... or something.
life's been weird. i stopped working in the middle of januaury because i just can't. can't get up and walk into the arms of the republican goliath. these wheels on these machines, they squeal. like the pigs they represent. so? "i quit," in a voice so small a mouse struggled to hear. i dislike anything that i don't like. in other words: i will not be pushed around right? so im jobless, and march 18th still jobless. loving it so much in so many ways but its painful too.
i get up in the morning, an hour or two before the sun falls under the moon's blankets. i play guitar until my heart sings. i sing until my eyes tear. or some days my throat just won't let me sing two songs without falling to pieces... it causes vomiting other days. dry heaving at least. i eat food. i like showers. i smoke green things, and brown things, but never white things. day to day right?
i met a girl. i had a crush on her in first grade. but she disappeared for like.... 17 years? approximated. Kali. I, during my entire life, remembere this girl's name and had a vague and unrelated memory of her face/smile/eyes. So... i walk into a store around the block for some smokes. "nice shirt. im going to a party in brooklyn tonight, and fife-dog is spinning records." so she was being friendly. i like my shirt too, it was nice that she noticed. AND she likes tribe. so like.. a while later.. im getting smokes again. she offers me a donut.
i wanted chocolate but i took jelly... for her sake.
by the end of january, she offered me her number. we remembered a bit about the first grade. we talked over beers and a joint. she has an allergy to marijuana resin. she has a reaction when she gets it on her hands and then rubs her eyes or mouth or something. pretty fucked up i guess.
ive been getting out more. started to play some local open mic nights. singing for a cover band.. but i think im done with that now. broke the car i was driving so now i walk again. early spring walkin talkin man. i wrote a song a while ago with the line "i'll bring elvis home for christmas but the jumpsuit stays with me." i don't understand what that meant. more gifts from the dead i suppose.
Shareem is falling for a guy who happens to be in jail. again. the world always moves in the same directions i guess. we don't talk anymore. but ive been trying to contact her, to get her blessing. im going to fall in love with a girl, and i need reassurance that Shareem is alright with this all.
Hunter Thompson shot himself a while ago, and i thought that was pretty cool. he made it to 67 years and deserved to take a nap. we'll see him again i think.
Spring is here again.... reproductive glands....
i can't wait to move on. i think i am definitely a type of highly evolved parasite. oh the guilt! hahaha, whatever.... so im thinking about the middle part of this country. maybe i will go there and wait for a sign. a dirt road would do me justice now. i can't stand these new yawk high tawk accents. and the closet-queers who just wont admit the truth. fuck em. i wanna get myself down to texas and start a war... or something.