Post by Black Cross on Feb 22, 2005 0:32:37 GMT -5
Therapy
Your essence echoeing in my hollowed soul
Numbing tears cascade down a bottomless hole
I'm falling deeper into a black, infinite abyss
Every part of me ended with a single, fatal kiss
Every memory kills a piece of my heart
And souly you possess the largest part
I can show it better on paper than on skin
Your heart the most comfortable of all places I've been
Your eyes the most meaningful I'll never forget
I want to let go of it all, for it's everything I regret
But I'm losing myself in my thoughts of you
On this paper is what I feel for you, some old, some new
How I wish you could read it all
That you could hear the abyss call
And see the red ink, signifying blood
And the heart you trampled in the mud
Scars blooming on snow white paper
With every word, your essence will taper
This is my therapy, my only release
So maybe the pain you cause will cease
Someday, soon I hope, you'll know
That I hate you, but love you so
Bottled Up
It's so much easier this way
You hating me and all
As long as you don't speak to me
I have a reason to dislike you
Resentment that will mask my fear
The fear you'll change your mind
Decide you want to become friends
That would kill me, you know
Every feeling for you I've bottled up
Would rush out with one kind gesture
I'd be head over heels again
Opening my heart to all of you
Making it vunerable for you to shatter
Then we'd be back at the beginning
Crying for you every, single moment
Each tear carrying my love
It would end, eventually
And I'd be here
Happy to have you hate me
So I can push you away
Instead of pulling you in
Always thought all my heart was with you
Then you break it and I lose it entirely
Now I'm searching for the many pieces
Looking where I will never find them
Turning to boys or "self-expression"
You don't know the half of what I've done
But, to no surprise, my heart was with you
I knew it all along, wanted to deny it
How am I supposed to fix myself
When the biggest problem hates me
We need to be at peace with one another
That way I can began to heal
And maybe we could be okay
No more harsh feelings of cold stares
To move on I need to make amends
To patch my broken heart, I need neatrality
So hand me my pieces gently
Treat them with the utmost care
But keep a small shard for yourself
For whether you like it or not
Half of my soul will be with you
Nightmare
Trapped inside a dying shell
And no one seems to care
It's torture to feel as a prisoner
In your own body
Not knowing what other's are judging
Murder to constantly live in fear
Felling like not a soul will help
Having to dwell in something you hate so
Putting on a flase front in light
Crying away the mask and pain after dark
But no matter how many tears
Slide down the face you despise
The resentment will never leave
Wishing you could stay asleep forever
For at least there you can be happy
Waking becomes the hardest thing
Because you walking into a nightmare
And barely existing in no one's hell
Shadows twisting in your soul
Waiting to wreck your life
But no other will know of the dark
Or see the menacing shadows
Smile, falsify happy
Paint your face, hide the disgust
Live your nightmare
Because no one will help you dream
Dream
I believe I'm falling for you
And losing myself in your mind
I'm building a dream
My own little world
Were it is only you and I
So I can fall to rest
Within your arms
And live the rest of my days
With my hand in yours
I'll do anything you want
And nothing you don't
Peaceful in the depths
Of my own fantasy universe
In which I find solice
Want never to leave
But reality awakens me
Into a life without you
Andnot knowing if
You have the same dream
As I is hurling me into a nightmare
Losing control
Here you are again
Ruining my life
Only have to see you once
To utterly lose control
Bittersweet memories
Clog my mind
And I'm happy remembering
The good times
But then I relive
Our painful end
Been awhile since
I've seen you
And I think; hope
I see a glitter of
Kindness in your eyes
Now I find myself
Wanting to lose control
To fall back into
Your arms
Because you make me happy
Like no other human can
And can cause tears
Unlike any others
I'm hoping; praying
You'll let me be happy again
Even if it means more tears
Timeless
Dark tunnel
File in
One by one
Morbid drawings
On the wall
Tell a story
Of love and pain
Boy and girl
Timeless tale
Interpret it
Your own way
Here goes
Lust, passion, love
Romance, fire
Heartache, pain
Knife, end
What do you
See in this
I see me
My timeless tale
Drag the waters
In my mind
'Til the depths
Relinquish
Its dead
Each corpse
Is part of me
Holds a secret
Dirty little secret
Dig deeper
Small box
Beautiful
Timeless treasure
Frail, delicate
Want it open
Search for the key
Dark tunnel
Go in
Key hidden
Pain etched
On walls
In my blood
Shows a story
Of love and tragedy
You and I
Timeless
Only You
He says he's madly in love
What should I do
Believe him, dont believe
I want to believe
Have nothing else
He's my reason for living
But it feels so...strange
So forbidden...so unreal
I love him, but I can't
That would be wrong
I would be exposing myself
For hurt and pain
Actually feel alive
And yet so dead
I'm so confused
Please help me out
Pull me out
Of this black hole
This spiriling death trap
This endless dream
Only he can help me
Help me understand
Please...please
Help me live, not die
Help me learn, help me love
Love like you love me
Your essence echoeing in my hollowed soul
Numbing tears cascade down a bottomless hole
I'm falling deeper into a black, infinite abyss
Every part of me ended with a single, fatal kiss
Every memory kills a piece of my heart
And souly you possess the largest part
I can show it better on paper than on skin
Your heart the most comfortable of all places I've been
Your eyes the most meaningful I'll never forget
I want to let go of it all, for it's everything I regret
But I'm losing myself in my thoughts of you
On this paper is what I feel for you, some old, some new
How I wish you could read it all
That you could hear the abyss call
And see the red ink, signifying blood
And the heart you trampled in the mud
Scars blooming on snow white paper
With every word, your essence will taper
This is my therapy, my only release
So maybe the pain you cause will cease
Someday, soon I hope, you'll know
That I hate you, but love you so
Bottled Up
It's so much easier this way
You hating me and all
As long as you don't speak to me
I have a reason to dislike you
Resentment that will mask my fear
The fear you'll change your mind
Decide you want to become friends
That would kill me, you know
Every feeling for you I've bottled up
Would rush out with one kind gesture
I'd be head over heels again
Opening my heart to all of you
Making it vunerable for you to shatter
Then we'd be back at the beginning
Crying for you every, single moment
Each tear carrying my love
It would end, eventually
And I'd be here
Happy to have you hate me
So I can push you away
Instead of pulling you in
Always thought all my heart was with you
Then you break it and I lose it entirely
Now I'm searching for the many pieces
Looking where I will never find them
Turning to boys or "self-expression"
You don't know the half of what I've done
But, to no surprise, my heart was with you
I knew it all along, wanted to deny it
How am I supposed to fix myself
When the biggest problem hates me
We need to be at peace with one another
That way I can began to heal
And maybe we could be okay
No more harsh feelings of cold stares
To move on I need to make amends
To patch my broken heart, I need neatrality
So hand me my pieces gently
Treat them with the utmost care
But keep a small shard for yourself
For whether you like it or not
Half of my soul will be with you
Nightmare
Trapped inside a dying shell
And no one seems to care
It's torture to feel as a prisoner
In your own body
Not knowing what other's are judging
Murder to constantly live in fear
Felling like not a soul will help
Having to dwell in something you hate so
Putting on a flase front in light
Crying away the mask and pain after dark
But no matter how many tears
Slide down the face you despise
The resentment will never leave
Wishing you could stay asleep forever
For at least there you can be happy
Waking becomes the hardest thing
Because you walking into a nightmare
And barely existing in no one's hell
Shadows twisting in your soul
Waiting to wreck your life
But no other will know of the dark
Or see the menacing shadows
Smile, falsify happy
Paint your face, hide the disgust
Live your nightmare
Because no one will help you dream
Dream
I believe I'm falling for you
And losing myself in your mind
I'm building a dream
My own little world
Were it is only you and I
So I can fall to rest
Within your arms
And live the rest of my days
With my hand in yours
I'll do anything you want
And nothing you don't
Peaceful in the depths
Of my own fantasy universe
In which I find solice
Want never to leave
But reality awakens me
Into a life without you
Andnot knowing if
You have the same dream
As I is hurling me into a nightmare
Losing control
Here you are again
Ruining my life
Only have to see you once
To utterly lose control
Bittersweet memories
Clog my mind
And I'm happy remembering
The good times
But then I relive
Our painful end
Been awhile since
I've seen you
And I think; hope
I see a glitter of
Kindness in your eyes
Now I find myself
Wanting to lose control
To fall back into
Your arms
Because you make me happy
Like no other human can
And can cause tears
Unlike any others
I'm hoping; praying
You'll let me be happy again
Even if it means more tears
Timeless
Dark tunnel
File in
One by one
Morbid drawings
On the wall
Tell a story
Of love and pain
Boy and girl
Timeless tale
Interpret it
Your own way
Here goes
Lust, passion, love
Romance, fire
Heartache, pain
Knife, end
What do you
See in this
I see me
My timeless tale
Drag the waters
In my mind
'Til the depths
Relinquish
Its dead
Each corpse
Is part of me
Holds a secret
Dirty little secret
Dig deeper
Small box
Beautiful
Timeless treasure
Frail, delicate
Want it open
Search for the key
Dark tunnel
Go in
Key hidden
Pain etched
On walls
In my blood
Shows a story
Of love and tragedy
You and I
Timeless
Only You
He says he's madly in love
What should I do
Believe him, dont believe
I want to believe
Have nothing else
He's my reason for living
But it feels so...strange
So forbidden...so unreal
I love him, but I can't
That would be wrong
I would be exposing myself
For hurt and pain
Actually feel alive
And yet so dead
I'm so confused
Please help me out
Pull me out
Of this black hole
This spiriling death trap
This endless dream
Only he can help me
Help me understand
Please...please
Help me live, not die
Help me learn, help me love
Love like you love me